I've always been slightly obsessed with things that are girly. Not in an "omg everything I own should be pink" kind of way, I'm not insane (and I'm not that big a fan of pink). Instead, my way of being obsessed with girly has been, either really avoiding being girly or, really liking being girly. I've wanted to write this blog for quite a while, mainly because I've always had rather a warped idea of femininity and writing about this sort of thing always helps me. I think it's only in the last 6 months that I've actually sorted my idea of femininity out. I think a lot, I've gathered I'm weird. Shush.
When I was 15 I wore baggy jeans, t-shirts, thick black eye-liner, had a massive emo fringe and wore hoodies with stupid badges on. I was pretty sure my parents either thought I was a lesbian, a social reject or both. Everyone I knew was 'quirky' and I was a proper geek. Femininity was so the last thing I wanted to have, mainly because I thought femininity meant all I wanted to do in life was attract guys and be all "let's paint our nails, giggle and watch rom-coms". Basically, I associated femininity with being ditzy.
When I went to college I met some of the best people, people who wore skirts and dresses. Oh how they saved me. I also met quite a few guys who were very in to the whole "women should be good housewives, look after the children and basically have no lives" idea. Seriously, where was my college, the fucking 1950s? Why didn't I just hit them instead of taking this all on-board and ruining my self-esteem and brain for a good(/stupid) 3 years? Anyway, I was easily influenced and I decided that I hated feminism, and that I totally wanted the 2.4 children, loving husband, and the white picket fence (I'm currently feeling a little sick writing this). Mission: Become More Girly was in operation. I was pretty shit at it to be honest, I'm not into looking really groomed all the time. By the time the end of sixth form appeared I was completely different to 15 year old Sophie. Some people had never seen me in trousers, ever. This was now normal. I was totally on the way to the 1950s, except ya know...I was going to university and all that 'having rights' shit. Pretty good shit, really.
Going to uni meant a few things.
- Being lumbered with feminists.
- Being lumbered with people who thought being a housewife would be boring.
- Being lumbered with girls who were smart AND feminine (clearly freaks).
No matter what age you are, being feminine is something women worry about. I know that I still worry about it, and this is me, a girl with long hair, always painted nails, I do the girliest subject at uni and I wear dresses and skirts everyday. I'm a proper girl (don't take that proper as in people who don't do that aren't girls, that would make you an idiot for reading it that way). However, I do wonder, if I just stopped doing all that would I still be girly? Would I even care? It slightly depresses me, because I'd massively care and I've no idea why. Some feminists make out that wearing make-up and spending time on grooming is just ridiculous, it's another way of keeping women 'down'. I don't think that things that are classed as 'girly' should necessarily be a weakness, why can't we just embrace these things rather than accusing them of being harmful to feminism?
Seriously, I'm all for sharing this girly shit, a lot of men could seriously do with some make-up.
Life.
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