Working. Unemployed.

I'm currently ill in bed and trying to fit this quick post in before Corrie.

Some of you may know that in an attempt to pay off my overdraft and get a life I've got a temporary waitressing job in a restaurant. The hours are long and it pays minimum wages and it's TIRING. The people I work with are all lovely and make it a gazillion times better than it otherwise would be.

I just have a few things I kind of wanted to say about it. Not because you all want to read it or anything as ridiculous as that, but occasionally I like to flick through this blog and remind myself of times when I've been happy/sad/angry and I felt I should probably note this whole temporary work fiasco down.

Working from 12pm until 11pm -and sometimes past midnight- is tiring and depressing. There's no time for anything else, I've not seen any friends in ages (except my best friend and that's because we coincidentally have had the same days off). I've cried more in the past two weeks than I probably have in the past 3 months. I've gone from one extreme (being unemployed with all the time in the world) to working all the hours ever. I'd never ever say I was work-shy, I've pretty much always been employed since I was 15 and it's never been desk jobs so it's not like I'm scared of being on my feet all day or anything as pathetic as that. It's just that this is not healthy, I don't know how anybody does it, but I do know that for many it's not a choice *serious face*. From speaking to the fab people that I work with there are cases of people that have debt to repay (nothing like the measly grand a half of overdraft that I have), haven't been able to get apprenticeships or have simply ended up there just as I have.

It feels weird to write, I haven't actually written a single thing in ages and I feel like I've forgotten how to do it. Apologies if this ramble is hard to read, I'm trying to make it at least a little coherent.

So yes, anyway. I was thinking about a lot of things today and I have a few points.

• I was watching that Dispatches episodes about rubbish collections and recycling and why the fuck did they not mention restaurants once? This is the second restaurant I've worked in and both have been  appalling for recycling. There's this massive focus on household waste and recycling but never a mention of the catering industry, especially in the mainstream media. Do we just ignore that? Is that the done thing? The amount of glass, cardboard and food waste that gets taken to landfill is just crazy. Well annoying.
• No-one who works 12 hours a day has any time for politics. Fucking lucky too, because if they did have the time to pay attention to it they'd be really angry at it all (well, angrier...). Even I -someone who <3s politics- has been plagued with a horrible bitterness towards people in politics in the space of a fortnight. Obviously when I'm unemployed again my bitterness shall be focused on a different aspect of politics (which can be summarised with the well known phrase "fucking Tories").
• I'll be unemployed again after the first week of November. I'm ridiculously lucky to have parents who aren't charging me any rent whilst I pay off my overdraft and such. However, there are some people who will be made unemployed when I will -because it's the end of Blackpool's season when the illuminations are turned off- and they have families to look after and rent to pay. The bus I get to work drives through one of the poorest wards in Blackpool and for many people living in that ward it'll only get worse at the end of the season. This isn't a "oh poor them in their poor situation" thing. I've lived in that, I'm not feeling sorry for them, I'm angry. Since I was a kid there's now more help in schools for poor kids and there is more help for parents, but towns like Blackpool still have nothing in the way of good, permanent employment. Masses of people are loaded onto the dole queue every November until late February and it's months of hard winters for all of them. I know Blackpool is undergoing a regeneration at the moment, and fair enough, it's looking nicer and the town attracted 13 million visitors this year, but where are the benefits to those of us who actually live here? Where are the proper jobs? Where is all this money that's being pumped into the local economy going? FOR REAL. So much anger at all of this.

Anyway. I think I'm done ranting now. If anyone made it this far then you're a bit weird but it's really appreciated. Corrie is on now, good timing.

Oh Hurricane

Hurricane

Blackpool was getting some sort of ex-Hurricane Katia blah*. 

It's very windy. 

Here are a few pictures I took when I walked back from the town centre.

*I have a Geography A-Level, I can assure you that's the proper terminology.

Sexuality nonsense

I know I get in a bit of a feminist hissy quite a lot, but I think today and yesterday I've had my sexualities hat on and have been watching out for any sexuality-related nonsense.

Firstly, scientists have proven that bisexuality is an actual thing. I know right. Who'd have known? I really like that bisexuals have a validated sexuality; they must be relieved to know they're no longer abnormal, thanks Science! It's a bit insulting, isn't it? There are loads of sexualities and if we're going to have to sit around and wait for scientists to decide that they exist* then we'll be waiting a very long time.

Graduate Limbo

Since graduating I've found life to be a bit weird. I had Results Limbo a couple of weeks ago and now this seems to be some sort of Graduate Limbo. I would sum up my current feelings with the Britney Spears song "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman". I'm not having some sort of age crisis, or self-identification crisis, I'm having a "what on Earth am I even doing with my life?" crisis (all in-betweeny crises can be summed up by that song). I've moved back home and reverted back to my Sixth Form self, except this time I have no definite plan of what I will be doing and when. I see this as some sort of punishment, to be honest. I've always wanted to teach, I've never really cared what, as long as I can teach something to someone (within reason, guyz, come on). Now I've finished full-time education the thing I thought was my vocation is no longer so. This is a bit annoying.

(I've just put that Britney song on. It's so good)

I have had some life progress though. I shall be writing the piece on Gender for GEER's Red Book which comes out in September. GEER (which I occasionally mis-type GEEK for no reason, the letters aren't even near each other on the keyboard *sigh*) is a Labour-Left think tank that aims to move on from Tony Blair's Third Way in a new direction, a direction that doesn't (again *rolls eyes*) cuddle-up to neo-liberalism. So far I've really liked many of the posts that have been written by members of GEER and I'm ridiculously nervous about putting up a post of my own. I'm horribly self-conscious when it comes to my writing. There's no place for self-deprecating humour when I write a "proper thing", it doesn't come across very well. I have the utmost belief in the points I want to put across in the Gender piece and I don't want my own self-consciousness to ruin my argument, there are enough wankers out there who'll try and do that for me *sigh*.

Bright Eyes

Best post ever.

I wasn't originally going to see Bright Eyes, not for any good reason, I just didn't know whether I'd be at uni or at home when the tickets came out. So when someone cropped up on Twitter and said they knew someone with a ticket I was all over that. Joyous.

I'm quite excited. Mainly because they were my 15 year old emo love. Conor Oberst is an intense (but beautiful) man and I'm pretty sure his face IRL will be wonderful. 

I may even cry.

If he doesn't play the following few songs I will be crying both because of rage and because I'm emo.

 

This is a massive weeper.

Anything off Digital Ash will make me happy. I love that album.

Guh <3

I love this song. This is 100% getting played, so I'm not worried *temporarily stops crying*

(I really hate these weirdo lyrics videos) This song is creepy. I kinda like that.

This is also quite creepy. Still love it though.

Basically, lots of their songs and lots of intensity. 

I think this gig will be quite a bit like the Death Cab one I went to. I couldn't bring myself to sing to a lot of their stuff purely because I refused to sing over Ben Gibbard's voice. He is also fab.

State substitution.

'Weak states have been further weakened by an inability to deal with the political and social turmoil and rebellion resulting from globalization. Often economic liberalization and deregulation have been accompanied by a reduction in the role of the state - in both the economy and society, in the developing world (whilst in industrialized countries over the past two decades of globalization, a solid core of governmental activity has remained untouched - and untouchable such as the National Health Service in the United Kingdom). In developing countries where governments were often weak to begin with, `rolling back the state' in order to enhance global competitiveness has left a vacuum of political authority. This has been clearly demonstrated around the Southern and Eastern Mediterranean where after state subsidies and basic services were cut back during the 1980s, Islamic groups and other non-state actors quickly stepped in to substitute for the government: providing health care, soup kitchens, education and other social services. The substitution, however, had deeper implications for the state since many non-state actors did not just provide social goods, rather they mounted a direct challenge to the authority and legitimacy of the state.'

- The Political Economy of Globalization (By Ngaire Woods) 

"Oedipus was the first mother fucker"

People who are younger than you and achieve massive things are rather annoying. I'm only 20 years old (which is pretty young...) yet people younger than me are multi-millionaires. Uhhhh. Saying that, I lack any specific talents; I make a good brew and I'm kinda useful in an argument but you can't really make money off that. Anyway, all of this has a point - I recently went to see Bo Burnham at the Arts Centre on campus. He is younger than me by a whole couple of months. A whole couple of months. Guh.

Bo Burnham is as close to my perfect comedian as I'm ever going to get. He calls himself an 'artist' throughout the show, and whilst he says this in an arrogant and rather satirical tone, there is an air about Burnham that I believe permits him to say he's an artist (maybe it’s just me that thinks this). His show was a wonderful conglomeration of music, comedy and theatricals; and his flexibility as a performer is completely captivating. Naturally I can’t help but sit there with my mouth slightly open and my eyes glazed over as I stare and swoon.

He has a rather camp vibe to him which I’m pretty sure he has because he’s really tall. Pretty much everyone I meet who is tall and skinny also happens to be quite awkward (...and camp); I think it’s because you’re quite aware of your height and so you’re not really sure how to hold yourself and that translates into looking camp (hand on the hip type thing). I only say this because I’m tall(ish, I’m 5’8”) and when I’m surrounded by lots of short women my body language is really awkward (the fact I’ve noticed this is a step towards progress, woo!). His campness is quite charming, there was an amazing bit where he was talking about how his Dad always thought he was gay and how surprised he was by this...he then threw glitter and confetti all over himself in a beautifully camp manner. Love it.

Anyway, here's some of his stuff for you to watch and love. His show was amazing and I would recommend it to anyone. A couple of the new songs he played look brilliant too. You all must go and see his show if you ever get the chance :D 

Two albums are also on Spotify.

(By the way, he took the piss out of Michael McIntyre - it was HILAIR)

Results Limbo

I finished my degree over three weeks ago now, naturally I have done nothing of any importance since then. I've applied for a few jobs, edited my CV, got drunk, danced around the house, got drunk, did a bit of tidying, seen friends for food and brews and slept a lot. It's super nice, if a little empty - I'll worry about the emptiness when I go home in a week...maybe

There's just something really nice about not having my results yet. I've had a few nightmares, which have obviously been horrible. It's not that I think I'll fail, I'm 100% sure I've passed, I'm just worried about what I'll get. Guh. However, now I know when results day is the nightmares have stopped. Thank God.

Current love of life. Need to see the new X Men film so that I can swoon over him more than I already do.

Degree = Finished

Now that my degree is over (I know, how exciting/scary) I will probably using this dear blog to type something a little bit more profound (maybe) to what I usually write across the internet. Let's keep in mind most of my writing on the internet is either in a Facebook chat box or on Twitter, so it's not that hard to write something more profound, all I have to do is probably spell a little better and not think in 140 characters or less. Difficult timez guyz. So yeah, no promises, innit.

I write in such a chatty manner, I'm glad I never have to see "quite informal writing style" on another list of essay criticisms ever again. I don't write like this in essays, but sometimes I get a little chatty and when it's 3am and I'm on 700 words of a 2500 word essay, I'm hyped up due to too much sugar (Haribo and a little sugar in my tea when I'm feeling adventurous) and I would like to be in bed rather than writing about policies that probably didn't work or had some irritating ever-lasting mark of ridiculous (ASBOs, I'm looking at you).

This blog post isn't anything really, I'm just sad that it's all over. I'm currently approaching it with humour, in about a months time expect me to be crying and uploading a picture via iPhone Blogger of me chained to Warwick's University House. Don't do that face at me. It could happen.

Mélanie Laurent.

Mélanie Laurent - Kiss

This whole album is lovely, I particularly like this track though :)

Revising is currently taking place. Finish my degree in a week and a half, eeek!

Things have happened.

Well hello, it's been a while, I'm alive but currently unwell. Hope you're all fabulous!

I should probably write a few things about life and such. Well, I gave up meat for Lent, wrote 19,000 words for my degree, campaigned a lot for Labour in the Local Elections and generally procrastinated by watching TV and listening to a lot of new albums that have been released. That sums up my past month (yes, month!).

Here are pictures to look at and things you should listen to :)

1 - DemocraTea in Curiositea on campus, cheeky election-themed cuppa.

2 - Cake and a Belgian waffle with Danni

3 (left) - Wham bars are always a good mid-essay treat :)

4 (right) - Lots of helium-filled 'Vote Labour' balloons, off on the campaign trail

5 - Evening walk down the prom in Blackpool, lovely.

Cheeky bit of new music :)

The Wombats

Guillemots

Fleet Foxes

Architecture in Helsinki

Beastie Boys

Alexi Murdoch

Gorillaz

History of my relationship with iTunes(ish)

Spotify went offline so I had to resort to my iTunes. Whilst this isn't a bad thing, it is a bit annoying as it's not the most up-to-date music library. I've had this iTunes (on various computers) for probably about 7 years. Obviously before I had my iPod Mini (wahey!) I had Windows Media Player, which was obviously pink and had those pretty visuals. Oh how I miss you simple, non-fucky-uppy WMP (not the pink though, I really don't miss the pink).

As much at I loved my iPod Mini people would ask to borrow it to use in lessons and saying 'no' would also have meant saying 'no' to people who would probably bully me. I hate girls in High School. I didn't want to be deprived of the musical delights of Good Charlotte (Yeah, I know. Just don't). However, they can swivel because I got the best coursework grade in the year for that class, so booo-yaaaahhh. Either way, I won in the end...and I saw Good Charlotte at Manchester Apollo in 2006. (I don't want any other definitions of 'won', thankyouverymuch, sarcy bastards).

Anyway, this was meant to be a blog about iTunes. So yes, I hate iTunes. I don't know if this is because I lack a Mac, or because I'm just doing it wrong; but I'm pretty sure it is just shit. When I first got it it was fine, we were friends, it was pretty simple and I liked having all the cover art on that pretty slide thing. It was definitely an improvement on the pink WMP (visually, anyway). Now it's 2011 it wants me to update it ALL.THE.TIME, it crashes more, it has so many stupid things in the sidebar that my play-lists are half-way down the side (I just want the option to 'hide' the other menus you give me, iTunes, that's not that hard). Also, it's always trying to take me to the fucking iTunes Store, leave me alooonnneeee. When I buy music online I am not buying it from your shop of hell *hmph*

Please file this blog under First-World Problems and White Whine and leave me with my collection of The Cribs albums I've rediscovered (from before Johnny Marr joined and they suddenly got awful).

Is Feminism Still Relevant?

Joyous uni occasionally has less than joyous - but still necessary - debates, and I am a great lover debates.

The other day there was a debate on whether feminism is still relevant. I know right? Of course it is. To say it is not is completely ignorant and ethnocentric. Whether you believe there is gender equality in this country or not, you can in no-way deny that feminism is still needed as a movement to promote gender equality worldwide. Note the use of the words 'gender equality', that is, as it says, the equality of the genders (genders being fluid and many, we reject binary here, guys). For some reason people have this obscure perception that feminism is 'man-hating', a lot of this is probably down to the lack of mainstream feminist debate in popular culture *sigh*.

Just wanted to get that out there, it is still relevant, somewhere for someone. Don't hate.

Muse songs all sound the same.

You know when bands get a nice amount of success, they either continue doing exactly what they were doing and it all gets a bit samey, or they go completely mental and sound like a completely different get-up. Muse is one of those bands that I think fits into the former category, their music is very samey (imo). That's not to say their music isn't good, I'm just saying, heard one Muse album, heard 'em all. 


Part of me think it's just Matt Bellamy singing in exactly the same way in every-single-song but then after sitting down to write this blog, and listening to a lot of their music on Spotify (today and in life), I have come to the conclusion that they really do sound similar...

Here is my I'm-avoiding-work-so-made-up-this-thing-for-Muse-songs thing.

1. No bass, possibly bit of rhythm guitar (or vice versa, the bass and no rhythm guitar). Usually a bit of singing after a good 10 seconds.
2. Bass/rhythm guitar kicks in, words are more (but probably not very) coherent now...
3. Some kind of "unusual instrument" will come in like some kind of brass/strings/odd sound
4. Lots of noise, lots of whining, (this bit is usually the bridge)
5. Loonnnggg whine from Bellamy or more "unusual instruments" (sometimes even both, urgh)
6. Bit where everything cuts outs except for some kind of hook or Bellamy whaling. 
7. Build the song back up (usually without the hook...)
8. Then the hook....then the "unusual instrument"
9. Lots of noise, lots of whining (usually the bridge)
10. Loonnnggg partially-coherent whines from Bellamy, more "unusual instruments"
11. Just a rhythm guitar and a random unusual instrument.
12. Then just some more singing/whining and probably an increase in tempo and noise before the song ends (not always though, sometimes they like a good dramatic end, woo diversity!)

Also, just going passive-aggressively throw this out there, I'm not saying this is a bad thing, I love a good hook, doesn't everyone? It's good hooks that get me singing "I whip my hair back and forth" drunk in clubs. A lot of bands sound very similar, I just happened to have picked up on Muse because they have a massive fan base that I want to judge.

I will leave you with City of Delusion, the song that I think sums Muse up. It's not their best, nor is it their worst, but it is very "Muse".

Also, not dissin' Matt Bellamy's falsetto, before any of you get a grump on.

Youth unemployment

I wrote an essay on youth unemployment (for one of my degree modules) the other day and it was quite depressing. I'm currently nearing the end of my degree, I've got a few more weeks left of lectures and seminars and then that's it, exams, graduation and I'm done. I'm at the third best university in the country, am on track for a 2:1, and yet I'm pretty sure when I'm finished here my employment prospects won't be much better than most.*

However, I'm doing so much work at the moment, it's very stressful and I feel like I never really escape working. Obviously sometimes I may go out, maybe watch a bit of TV and just slob out for a while; but there's a horrible guilty feeling I get when I don't spend my time working. It's made worse by the constant news stories on youth unemployment, they just totally demotivate me. (I feel like I should cut bit chunks of my essay for you all to read, but that would be quite odd, (and I probably wouldn't appreciate any criticism on an essay I've already handed in). )

The constant news stories and blogs on youth unemployment are slowly getting to me, I'm really worried about what I'm going to do when I'm finished with all this studying lark. It's getting to that point of the year where everyone is doing the "what are you doing when you finish?" chat, and everyone sounds so miserable, most people I've spoken to are hoping they can find a job at home, whilst fully acknowledging that they'll probably end up working for minimum wage and living with their parents to try and save up. It's a reality that a large majority of us are only now really coming to terms with.

I'm not at all 'bashing' jobs that pay the National Minimum Wage here, I'm just highlighting that we all went away to uni so we didn't have to end up on the NMW. Going to uni and getting into thousands of pounds of debt, only to get your degree and still live with your rents whilst you pull pints (if you're lucky) is not what any of us expected. I just feel a bit cheated, that's all. My school, sixth form and parents constantly pushed this idea that if I got a degree then it'd be so much easier for me to get a well-paid job, and here I am, 2011, worrying I won't even be able to get a job that pays the NMW, it's just ridiculous, demotivating and depressing.


* I'm aware of the presumptuousness of it all, but I do think it's quite necessary.

Defending things.

I get very tired of defending things, I can see why people tend to sit on the fence rather a lot. There's no defending any particular point of view, there's no arguing, you can see both sides, it's all plain and lovely on the elevation that is 'the fence'.

I however, am not a fence-sitter*, pretty much never do I place my arse on the Lib Dem fence. Annoyingly, actually making up your mind about something comes with issues, as once you pick your side you have to stay there (could make another 'lol the Lib Dems' comment, but two in one paragraph is just distasteful to be honest). This 'side' that you pick will then be a source of great annoyance, as everyone ever will blame you for things because you're a representative of that 'side'. Pah.

Occasionally you'll be the only person of this 'side' in a group of people, and suddenly everyone is Mr/Ms. Inquisitive. Urgh.

I always seem to get "So you're a [insert group-type here], right? What do you think of [insert random thing that said group has done that was 'bad' or something the 'crazies' of that group think]?" ALL THE TIME. It's like people think I'm a walking manifesto of what a specific group of people think. People also seem to assume that I'm just going to blindly support something that one person in a group has said, it's ridiculous. I'm only one person, not the collective thought of a huge, diverse group of people.

After a while you get sick of hearing the similar list of arguments (e.g. 'You're a feminist so you hate men (/must be a lesbian), right?', 'You're a Labour Party supporter, but what about the Iraq War/immigrants/the recession/tuition fees and higher ed etc?'). Genuinely drives me potty. I'm relatively calm with people in debates, which is working well for the groups I've attached myself to (be grateful, feminists. I defend feminism a lot).

I have no problem with people asking me questions, that's not what I'm complaining about here. I'm complaining about people making me a spokesperson for that group of people. People shouldn't be so gullible to believe that just because you subscribe to a particular group, you automatically subscribe to all the views of said group.

And if anyone comes back to me with 'well if you don't support [insert a singular thing the group has done], then why do you support them?' Please go away, that's an awful response to this whole post and you have no real approach to life.

*I will mention, the only time I am a fence-sitter is during discussions on religion. This is because I'm an agnostic, the ultimate fence-sitter.

Labour vs Conservative

I finally, FINALLY, told my Dad that I am a Labour supporter. This is really deserving of a whole blog post by the way. The reason this is a big deal is because my Dad is Tory voter (along with the rest of my Dad's side of the family). I KNOW, RIGHT?

I've been slightly scared of telling him for a while (and not because he'll cast me out of the family and make me walk into the Irish Sea, he's not mental.) My reasoning is, once you side yourself with a group, you then become the "go to person" for the opinion of said group... and basically, I really don't want that effort when I'm at home. Really, I don't. I know I'm an argumentative shit, but I don't want a debate when I'm in my jammies lounging around watching the news.

Part of me thinks he may have already known, maybe...probably not. I still have his "why you always going on about that equality?" line in my head. Absolute classic.

However, I'm pretty sure I dodged a bullet by combining the "I'm a Labour supporter" speech with the "I have an internship" speech. Smart move.


This will basically be my life at home from now on.

Mary Portas

Now, before I actually write what I want to write about, I usually love Mary Portas. I thought the series she had done for the BBC on independent shops (last year) and on charity shops (the year before last) were both amazing. Ok, not amazing like Planet Earth amazing, she's no Attenborough, but they were good TV shows.

Portas has now moved to Channel 4 and has a new show called Mary Portas: Secret Shopper, in which she dons a wig and parades around being outraged at the state of our beloved high street. By the way, I don't plan on doing some hideous review of it as such, as the show itself wasn't actually that bad, and it'll probably get better throughout the series; however, I do have a few gripes, and I shall explain them now...

The whole show is based upon what Portas calls the 'shopping experience'. The 'shopping experience' consists of four rules, I can't even remember them, they were boring and a bit "well, duh". What I don't understand, is how she thinks it's even possible to extend rules that's she's obviously taken from the independent stores she usually frequents, to the high street, where the shops are busier, larger and have a higher turnover of stock *sigh*.

Obviously if you're going to make any form of film about something you don't want things to look "a bit shit" and "bordering acceptable", you wanna go all out and show some eXtremes. So naturally she heads to Primark, the one place on the high street officially void of all organisation. A bit of covert filming of the staff and messy shop-floor takes place, she counts people in the queue and then at the tills, it's all very scientific. I think this may have been the first time Portas has ever set foot in a Primark, as everyone knows you don't go into Primark for the 'shopping experience'. Experience, yes; shopping experience, no. It's more of an 'ordeal'. She goes on to complain that staff don't know where things are, but really, come on? If the staff in Primark did know where everything in Primark was, they wouldn't be working in Primark, because that would make them fucking geniuses. GIVE THEM SOME BLOODY CREDIT, PORTAS.

There are a series of vox pops with "normal looking people on high streets" and they're all pissed off at their lack of 'shopping experience'. Again, seriously, who are these people? I was discussing the whole being-approached-by-sale-assistants thing with one of my flatmates, and we decided that no-one likes it. I like walking in, having a browse and not being bothered, and I'm pretty sure most people (in Britain, anyway) are the same. (If you like being approached by helpful strangers in shops, then let yourself be known, freaks).

She then settles on revamping Pilot, which I have only just realised is quite funny, as it's the first episode, and it's called Pilot because of the shop she revamps, not because it's the pilot episode. The mind boggles. Pilot only has 44 stores, so it's possible for her to have her wicked way with them all, unlike Primark, where she hasn't got a batshit chance in hell of even making them pick their dirty bras off the floor (literally).

Anyway, the point of this blog was/is, whilst Portas does have a point, that the high street rakes in massive profits and we (the shoppers on the high street) get poor customer service, I just don't buy into her idea of the 'shopping experience'. I think most people appreciate a nice changing room, some sales assistants bobbing around, and not to have to queue for an eternity. I think that's fairly reasonable, and some shops do it well (Monsoon and H&M particularly)....

And despite what the crappy people in her vox pops may have said, I don't want people asking me what I'm looking for, I don't want people to be all "HELLO" when I walk into the shop and I don't want a fucking tweet mirror.

Youth of today, innit.

I have recently been walking more, mainly because I'm lazy and it's the most exercise I ever can muster up without wanting to die. However, today was freezing because of a horrendous wind (and because this is a seaside town in the North West of England... so it's always bloody windy). Anyway, to my point, I thought I'd walk a little bit inland to avoid being abused by the wind on the seafront, this - and my life being the way it is - meant I'd obviously get abused by something else, as that's how the world works, right? Now Blackpool is, erm, *achem* a wonderful place and a lot of the abuse you get is usually mildly funny, not because of what they say it, but because of how they say it (I'm aware that me saying it's how not what they say makes me a bit of a stereotypical woman).

Any conversation (/them saying things and me just giving them weird looks) that I have had with anyone under the age of 16 in the past couple of years* has always started with this, and tonight's weirdo child was no different...

A boy outside Tesco Express said "Oi, my mate thinks you're** fit." Now, I think if I was in need of a self-esteem boost, I'm not going to get it from someone who's voice clearly hasn't dropped yet. Obviously I just have to nod at this comment and give them a look of "urgh, but you're children". I'm not gonna be all "fanx, bbz, mebs gimme a text in 10 years time wen u don't sound like Justin Bieber", as that would be sick. Note the Justin Bieber reference, I'm so hip***.

This then turned in to him saying "love, will you get me some fags?", and because I'm still arsey about ever getting anyone fags (even my own parents, cos I'm that much of a bitch), I obviously said no. HOWEVER, this is where I get confused, in what world, seriously, do you then bargain? I said I wouldn't get him fags, and in my mind, if you were gonna bargain (which no-one would, because that's just insane) you could at least go down a level to something, like, I dunno, some super glue or a permanent marker. But clearly not this child...

He then said "well, you could at least give me a blow job." Now, because I went to a school with morons I'm very desensitised to these kind of comments, so much so I actually just said "pah!" in a humorous (and probably a bit mean) way and walked off (the whole time this was going on I was walking, but you get what I mean). I didn't even feel abused, ya know, as a woman just minding her own business down the street and then being hit on BY A CHILD.

This is why Blackpool is both hilarious and awful.




*This obviously doesn't include my sister and her friends, as they have a non-threatening approach to my life
**let's not lie, they probably wouldn't have used the correct "you're".
**Obviously saying hip makes me not hip, but whatever, I can try.

New Year

Seen as it is January 1st I thought I'd do a beginning of the year post, which - because this is me - will probably turn into some chat about crap. It's fine, let's sail through...

For starters:

- I broke my laptop charger because I'm a clumsy idiot.

- My camera broke and now takes well fit pictures of pink blurs. Everything is a pink blur. Fascinating.

- Pokemon is a life-sucker-upper.

Right, ok, now for the new year crap. I don't really do resolutions, mainly because I have very little motivation to do anything that doesn't come under my "really important shit" category; and a change of calendar will not make me less lazy, as much as I'd like it to. However, I will continue with my life thing of trying to make the best of life and I'll try to continue writing in my journal....possibly. Very much a land of 'possibly' and 'try'.

For New Year some freaks and I ventured about drinking wine and whiskey. This is all I'm going to say, as no-one wants to hear what I did. I'd just be typing it all out and I think I'd get bored writing it. Not to say it wasn't a good night, it was a really good night, but - as with most nights out - it's boring to relay the events back to people who don't know who you're on about. There's nothing (/a lot of things, but I'm exaggerating) worse than having to listen to a load of anecdotes about people you don't know/just don't care about. I sound miserable, I'm not, I just get very bored of "lad" stories and such.

Speaking of New Year's Eve, people who are like "I'm not going out on New Year's Eve, fuck NYE, it's not important", please shush, nobody cares if you stay in or not. It isn't some act of rebellion to stay in, it's perfectly normal. You don't need to justify the fact that you're not going out, it's finnneee! Not judging.

I'm now going to sit about for the next hour until this Father Ted night starts on Channel 4, how lovely. I may read my book.

You're all lovely :)